Have mercy on me

I always look forward the coming of the Sunday worship, because I never fail to be refreshed by God when I am worshiping him with my spirit. Some time I was half-asleep, and I know that was really a bad thing to admit. However, just hope God can just forgive my weakness.

Last Sunday, we got a bible class as usual. It is always my favorite session to learn the words of God. This time, we have reached the bible incident about a young rich man.(Mark 10:17-30) The young man ran to Jesus and knelt before him and asked him about the way to inherit eternal life. We interpreted the way he approached Jesus that time. We knew that the Jews don't run or rush in their daily life, because they believe that rushing is not polite and some more they wore long dress. It is not polite to run with a long dress. Besides that, kneeling down is a way to show your serious respect to someone. Based on his behaviors, we could recognize the longing heart of the young man. At the same time, we knew that he is smart to pick the right person to ask about eternal life, because he knew that Jesus is wise and authoritative.

However, Jesus replied him telling him to fulfill the commandments: "Do not murder, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not detraud, Honor your father and mother.". The young man replied and told him that all these he had kept from his  youth. Jesus loved him and said to him, You lack one thing; go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven ; and come, follow me."

Nonetheless, this reply disheartened the young man seriously, he went away sorrowful, for he had great possession. In the lesson, we were informed that God demands us not to reserve anything for our own will. We  are required to all-out in order to wholeheartedly follow him. Most of us failed to do that because we didn't really put God into the first priority. Actually the greatest commandment is to love our God with whole heart, whole mind and full effort. Nothing can be allowed to put before him in the priority.

Meanwhile I was asked to have self-examination. I asked myself about the things that I am not willing to let go. In the first place, I didn't think I have things I refuse to let go for God. However, now I realized the thing I am unwilling to let go eventually. Lord, can you just set me free from temptation or test? However, if this is your will, just let it be and teach me patiently. I wonder if you would get me back to you if I choose to leave you for other reasons. I hope I won't do that, but I don't trust myself now. Have mercy on me, God.