Funeral

One day before 13th of December,I received a message from one of the sisters in church telling me that aunty 春凤 had passed away. The news was shocking to me especially when I am pretty sure that I met here several weeks ago. I can't believe that people could pass away that easily without any premature information. At the same time, I didn't have much thing to reply to the message, as I was busy of studying. Brother, Ming Jia was the one who brought me to the funeral on that day. On the way going to the place, I was being informed by him about the reason of her death. She died because of cancer - cervical cancer which is regarded as one of the most dangerous cancers. She stopped going to church several weeks ago and within these weeks she was receiving treatments. The treatments were upsetting her. However, the cancer cells did spread rapidly and eventually caused mortality.

I didn't know that she was in trouble that time, perhaps I am really not a considerate people among church members. Being clueless of how she was in the period made me feel extremely guilty. Arriving the place, I saw a gorgeous building which I was informed that it is a commercial organization provides efficient service for the funeral ceremony which fulfills all kinds of religious demands. Now, I realized there is such thing like that. Getting in the lift, I was considering what to say to her family. Without delay, the gate opened, and I saw her husband and Brother Patrick standing in front of the gate, as if they were ready to welcome us. I just shook both of their hands without saying much things to them.

Having some cakes and tea over there, chatting with Ming Jia was effective to kill my time over there. After that, Ming Jia and I went into the hall which held the ceremony. The face photo of aunty was hung upright on the wall which ls located right in front of the gate of the hall. The chairs in the hall were exactly like the chairs inside the cinema. Air condition was cold enough until I felt quite sleepy in the hall.

We sang along songs of praise to Lord before somebody came out to praise Aunty 春凤. I discovered that Christian funeral is really encouraging to the Christians while they can see that the people who left us to heaven had done something beneficial to the people's life in the world and at the same time, those people came out on stage to praise them openly and proudly. I thank God that aunty had quite a good testimony and inspired the people over there very much. Besides that, it was to let the others get to know aunty's history more well.

Before the end of ceremony, we were invited to take a look on aunty face before they closed the classic coffin. I looked on aunty face with peace, as I can tell the peace on her face. She was like sleeping inside the coffin, but this time she was without soul in the body. Before leaving the hall, I gave a powerful embrace to uncle and his son. I found no words to say to them, but I believe that the embrace would be more appreciated compared to the verbal words that seems to be too lifeless and faded.

This funeral reminded me to take care of my father, as it was the case due to cancer as well. It reminded me to be concerned to the people around you, as we have no idea of when they will leave us. I pray for the guidance of God, so that I could be praised by somebody for the goods i have done to them and the glory will be proudly given to you, Lord. 

  

After exam

Students can never get rid of being examined in the process of studies. All the results on the graduation certification will label the students with a certain qualification and value depending on the grade. But thank God, I believe there are some other ways that employers used to examine the graduates.

Reading a book which contains thousands of people's faces, I noticed that my friends are actually having fun once after the examination. It was always a great decision to relax and play around with friends after the stressful examination which always drive people crazy. I pretty like this kind of relief. People get relieved after finishing their examination, but sadly I don't. I found myself getting more and more tension inside my heart as I know there are some serious matters that I need to face them after going back my hometown. Those things are complicated and don't seem to be solved easily.

I tried to relax today, by having fun at musical studio with friends. I appreciated our musical entertainment and enjoyment, we played a lot of nice songs, we did have fun certainly. However, I got the same feeling that every time I experienced after coming out from the 3 hours K box. That is emptiness. I shouted out loud and sang along songs with friends inside the studio room, this kind of action often helps me to relax and get rid of tension. However, I found that once again I came out from the room, I myself realized that I still need to face the reality. Whatever I did inside the room can never make a change on the matters in reality.

Reality is cruel and disappointing often while the people are innocent enough to search for the justice, peace in heart, and love. Some people gave up halfway when they were striving for them, some people still keep on seeking with determination, while some don't really care about that. I wonder since when the cheerful Chyi Chun became so sentimental. Is it the fault of the on-going time? Is it the fault of being too self-centered until I focus only on my emotion? Is it the fault to be too caring of the people around me, until I forgot that I still need to give myself some necessary concern?

Life is full with problems

Once again, I am studying in UM main library. It is still and silent until we can clearly hear the voice of the operating air-conditioners. I have studied for about 7 hours, and finally I put my notes aside and started to enjoy watching running man. I am not a fan of Running Man yet, but I think I will be the part of fans very soon. I quite appreciate this kind of entertaining program which brings a lot of laughter and happiness to the audiences and the participants. Laughing is a kind of exercise that nowadays people lack of. Initially, I believe that I could manage to hold my laughter in library when I was watching to Running Man. However, some of the scenes were extremely interesting and amusing. Even though I was covering my mouth, but my breathing was too intensive to attract people's attention. haha~
After watching an episode, I turned my face to the book and started to bury my head into the book gradually. At the mean while, I received a call. Guess what? My friend delivered my dinner to me. Well, it has been a long time since the last time I met and chatted with her. She doesn't look good actually, though she was trying to behave steady. We were chatting about ourselves and condition, while I was having my dinner gently. That was the first time I listened to her talking about her family and her life properly. We didn't really have one to one conversation, we did have but the conversations were all about Chinese Community. I did quite a pretty good job to know more about 11th CC members, though I realized that I have left her out unwittingly. She seldom talks about her family with us, I guess that was really unpleasant for her to share about her family.
During the conversation, I realized that her parents are typically traditional Chinese-background elders. They ain't open-minded to give their children freedom and treat them as adults. They insisted their children to follow their own will without really considering what their children want. As a result, they seldom communicate, as she finds no mutual understanding between them. Although she cares about what they say about her, but she doesn't want to do anything that is against her own will now. It is really lamentable to know about that and helpless to be lending my ears merely. Besides that, she is facing academical problem meanwhile. Her course is one of the most difficult subjects in UM. She is regret of her careless decision. However, I thank God that she chose to face those problems even though she doesn't really have any applicable solution.
Life is full with problems, isn't it? In my opinion, life without problems can never be meaningful as if we would never see the gorgeous rainbow unless we go through all the rains and storms.         

Magnification

"He was the first person who fell asleep every night in our room during the last session of study." It is what my roommates would comment to me when people ask them about my habit of sleeping.
Ya, I was the one who fell asleep very easily. I still remember that one of the greatest reasons was that I were having intensive basketball training that time. The tiring condition brought me to dream soundly and deeply. Even the alarm of the clock failed a thousand times over to wake me up, but I never blamed it but myself. Last night, I was supposed to sleep early as this morning I want to go to church for worship. I was lying on my bed with a thoughtful mind, it caused me failing to fall asleep.
Actually, one of my friends is having family problem. It was always too bad to see the persons you care for being upset and unmotivated and too helpless to be an utter listener. However, I saw something really precious in this situation. It was that her roommates are trying to cheer her up and other friends are trying to listen her problem and offer concern instead of suggestions. If she can see what she is having now - caring of friends, she must be very happy and motivated.
Sometimes, it is always a smart act to magnify the good things in your life, your happiness will then be magnified as well. Do not magnify the bad things, as it won't be enjoyable and beneficial to us. I believe that we rather to die with smile instead of tears.

No award for what you ought to do.

Silence is what I enjoy now in this harmony and peaceful library. I sat on a typical and comfortable office mobile chair at an artistic table. After a long period of study, I feel like to do something other than studying. I don't know whether it is right, but I just think I need to take a break by writing my thought on this blogger.
Thank God for all the sorrows that I have experienced as I know they are to give me some lessons of wisdom. Thank God for all the happiness I could get in my life no matter for big or small things, I know life could be worse if we find no satisfaction on our surrounding matters.
Things don't seem to go right sometimes, but I am trying to be optimistic as much as I manage. Sometimes I thank God for giving me a couple of parents who are so easily satisfied of their surrounding things. Thank God for giving me a group of good neighbors, they gave me a lesson that saying No can always be a beneficial action to your future. I am now in trouble, as I am not really well-prepared for this coming examination. However, I pray for God's guidance and wisdom, I don't wish to be defeated terribly by the exam papers.
I noticed something very interesting recently and I believe this thing can happen to guys often. After studying for a period of time, I would get tired and boring and I felt like it is time to get rest. During the rest, I would open my video games and play, as I treat it as an award after I studied. I know that I was applying some wrong theories. I think that we deserve award after studying. In fact, that is what we are supposed and ought to do. We deserve no award as we are doing something beneficial to our future somehow. haha~ With this theory in my mind, I did waste a lot of time on playing video games in fact. I am not addicted, but I failed to manage my time properly. Now, it is really regretful to face my mistake and torturing to face its consequence.
Bible says: you get what you sow.
I deserve no award, but in fact I deserve this aftermath. God bless~